Feliz Cumpleanos

Feliz Cumpleanos 

6In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

(1 Peter 1: 6-9)

Today would have been my Mom's 67th birthday, had she not gone home to be with the Lord. It will be 9 years ago tomorrow that she received the prognosis of having ALS, better know as Lou Gehrig's Disease. A disease that took her life in a matter of 6 months. And although, I miss you greatly Mom, although there is not a day that does not go by that I don't think about you. Although I can't wait to see you again. To laugh again until we cry. To meet my beautiful babies and to sit for hours just holding your hand again. Although this anticipation is of great worth to me, today is the first birthday since your death that I can say with complete confidence that....

Although I miss you and cannot wait to see you, my anticipation for Heaven has changed. My heart yearns to see God first. To see Him face to face and to be in His presence. I am in love. My heart cries out for the True and Living God. It longs to be in His presence and to feel the touch of His hand. I long to praise Him and worship Him face to face. I long to sit along side you Mom, at the marriage supper of the Lamb, and to rejoice together, with all of the saints, for the unspeakable things that He has done. I yearn for that day. Above all else, I yearn to see the face of my God.

What a glorious day that will be! There is not a day that does not go by that I do not thank Him for you. For how you taught me to be a woman of prayer. How you lead by example and taught me to be a woman of the Word. How you taught me to walk through trials with dignity and grace. How you taught me to laugh and to smile and to joke, because there is a lot to look forward to. Although the pain of your death left an empty place in my heart, God has filled that place. And although I miss you, I would not have things any other way.

I'll see you soon. I love you, you crazy lady!
Love,
Me

.:La Chula:.

Day 4 of 21: Be Ye Not Deceived

Be Ye Not Deceived

⁷ Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, that he will also reap. ⁸ For he who sows to his flesh will of the flesh reap corruption, but he who sows to the Spirit will of the Spirit reap everlasting life. ⁹ And let us not grow weary while doing good, for in due season we shall reap if we do not lose heart. ¹⁰ Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith. (Galatians 6:7-10)

Sin has reared its ugly head this week in unfathomable ways. I have seen those who claim the name of Christ mar the name of other Believers in a quest to crush their very character. In a quest to gain that which they think is owed to them, that which is believed to be their right. In the midst of this filth I have come face to face with the sobering thought that the Church is a sick and powerless body.  Those that claim the name of Christ seek not after those Truths that are revealed through Scripture, but after those things that feed their flesh and satisfy their need to be right, to be heard, to be appeased.

In the name of Christ we seek our own agendas and believe that He stands behind these agendas because we utter a prayer or plea for help. Not ever realizing that we give up our rights and no longer call ourselves our own the minute we decide to follow after Christ. The name Christian holds the connotation of one who follows after Christ, essentially a Christ follower. And yet, in this following we have been deceived. We follow after emotions, rather than the Scriptures. We follow after our rights, rather than giving up those rights for the sake of souls. We follow after our own agendas and attach the name of Christ to it believing that He will honor them because we do them in His Name. In reality, Christ has called us to give up everything for the sake of the Gospel. To give up our rights, and our desires, the following after our flesh, and the pursuit of those things that make us comfortable, in order that we might be crucified with Him. In order that we come to a place where we can truly proclaim that it is No longer I who live , but Christ who lives in me. (Galatians 2:20) 


Be ye not deceived!  That is, in regard to your character, and your hope for eternity. This phrase, in the Greek, implies that there is an acute danger that one could be deceived in reference to his character. The sources of the danger is the corruption of one's own heart, from the lies propagated by false teachers and false beliefs. We must be careful Church, that we take God's Word for God's Word. We must be careful to take instruction and to adhere to what it is calling us to do. We must be careful that we never assume that we have a right to anything. We must take heed so that our very words and actions do not deceive others around us and cause others to stumble and to sin.

God is not mocked, Brethren! He will not be derided or scorned or deceived. He knows the intentions of the heart and character of every man, especially of those who claim His name. He knows those things done in darkness and conceived in the heart. He knows these things and He will judge accordingly. What a heavy cross we bear when we attach the name of Christ to our agendas. When we pursue our own flesh and parade our filth to the world in the name of Jesus.

This world is a tremendously dark place. And it has brought great heaviness to my heart as I have seen this darkness blind the eyes of the Church. How can I continue to pray for revival and salvation for this dead world when the body of Christ is just as dead? How can I offer to this world a refuge when the body of Christ can only offer the stench of the dead man we continue to carry on our own backs? How can I continue to  do good to all, especially to those who are of the household of faith, when the household of faith has lost its way? 

My heart is heavy with sorrow for the body of Christ today. It is heavy with the pain that I, for far too long, was a dead man walking, and yet proclaiming the name of Christ in the pursuit of my own desires. And the thought of this very truth, that I wronged the name of Christ and misrepresented Him for so may years brings such sorrow and agony, knowing that I have probably caused the stumbling of countless Believers and furthermore, the loss of many souls because I pursued my own rights and my own desires, rather than those of Christ. 

Sin has reared its ugly head this week, and I have seen the wickedness of man's heart. And yet, in the midst of this ugliness I have seen the goodness of the Lord. I have seen His grace and His mercy. I have seen His willingness to commune with us, despite the fact that we are prone to wonder, prone to leave the very God that we proclaim to love. The more that I witness the sin of man, the more I witness the goodness of God. 

This is my plea today, Body of Christ. My plea for those of you who have truly chosen to be Christ-Followers despite the pain of crucifying the flesh. Not only in word, but in deed. Despite the difficulty we endure in learning to be Christ-like in a body that desires to serve its own desires....
Do not grow weary in doing good. Press on. Press in. Be encouraged. The closer you draw to God, the more painful thriving in this world becomes. Stand up for righteousness, purely for righteousness sake, even if you stand alone! Do good to all Believers, even those who choose to mock His name, because the Scripture calls us to that.  Stay above reproach, far from sin, and draw close to God. In due time, you will reap a plentiful harvest. A harvest of mens' souls, a harvest of blessing, a harvest that will pay 10-fold, if only you remain faithful. Be blessed Believer, as He is blessed by you.

.:La Chula:.

Praying and Revival

I've been reading "Absolute Surrender" by Andrew Murray and after this posting I will finish the last chapter and finish the book for probably the 10th time.  It's one of my favorite books easily read in a week or a weekend if you have time to focus on it.  I've read it over and over because every section has so many nuggets of wisdom to it. It is so encouraging and so relevant.  Even though I have read it many times there are things that hit me differently each time.  As each season of my life and my walk has taken me on different paths.  

As we have been seeking the Lord there have been specific themes we have been praying for as a united team, revival being one of them.  There are many things in my own life that I am laying at His feet and people who I love dearly that I've been specifically praying for.  Several of these people are ones who have walked away, some are living a complacent life, choosing to live for their flesh instead of in obedience.  Where others don't even realize that they are living a compromised life or they refuse to see that they are.  Either way they have been very heavy on my heart.  So when I was reading the passage I have pasted below, I thought of the revival and those who are living as they please. 

People who I once served alongside people who know the goodness, have lived and walked in His forgiveness. Some are the people I use to confide in or seek counsel from, who I could always count on to pray for me or hold me accountable.  I can not say I haven't been where they currently are, in a daze knowing I was being disobedient yet not caring, pretending I could hide from my Jesus so I could ??? .... it's strange but there is no real answer.   Yes there are a many answers but none of them making any sense now, none of them are worth living out of communion with my Savior for.  

Why can't we see it at the time, how can I encourage my friends, when they won't listen to me?  I have faith and believe that with prayer blinders will be removed, hearts will be softened...for serious brokeness and that whatever may need to take place in order for that to happen.  I would love to go smack them and say WAKE UP!   I pray that these people who once yearned for a daily continuos walk with their Jesus, will once again be consumed in his live and have the be their desire.  In our praying we have to remember that Jesus has conquered and if we walk in HIS power our prayers will bring revival amongst the people!!

the excerpt....

"Some are crying to God for a great revival I can say that this is the unceasing prayer of my heart oh that God would only revive  his believing people! I cannot think of the unconverted formalists of the church or of the infidels and skeptics or of all the wretched and perishing around me, with out my heart pleading: "My God, revive your church and people it is not for lack of reason that thousands of hearts yearn after holiness and consecration. It is a forerunner of God's power.  God works to will and then he works to do. These  yearnings are a witness and a proof that God has worked to will. Oh let us in faith believe that the omnipotent God will work to do among his people more than we can ask.

And he said,  The things which are impossible with men are possible with God. (Luke 18:27 KJV)

All around you there is a world of sin and sorrow and Satan is there but remember Christ is on the throne; Christ is stronger; Christ has conquered; and Christ will conquer.

But wait on God - Get linked to God.

Adore and trust Him as the omnipotent one not only for your own life but for all the souls that are entrusted  to you. Never pray without adoring his omnipotence, saying "Mighty God I claim your almightiness."

And the answer to prayer will come.

Like Abraham you will become strong in faith, giving glory to God, because you account him who has promised able to perform."   Andrew Murray - Absolute Surrender

Don't give up, continue to pray, LOVE on all who don't understand His love, love those who have never felt His love, and love those that need to return to HIS LOVE!!

Shine Brightly, jj

Day 3 of 21: Absolute Surrender

Absolute Surrender 

A friend sent me this excerpt from Andrew Murray's, Absolute Surrender. Andrew Murray was a theologian, pastor, and missionary who ministered in the late 1800's in South Africa. He believed that missions was the chief end of the church. He played a huge role in the South African Revival of 1860. This is a man that I have always greatly respected and admired through his writings.

Below you will find my response to what Andrew Murray penned 100+ years ago...

An Ode To Absolute Surrender

Come away my soul, and set yourself apart

Come out from amidst the dead mens bones

Come out from a world that despises your name

Come out and proclaim, I surrender

At any cost, I surrender

Come out with trembling will, be it ever so dreadful of a thought

To give up this old man, to rid thyself of the rotting carcass we call self

To give up a cup that has remained half full,

Pour thyself out as a drink offering before the Lord,

Wail and cry, lament with groanings before the Lord

Weigh the cost and surrender your will

Ask thyself, Am I willing to endure the anguish of death to self, 

to be poured out and emptied in pain and sorrow, 

to be filled with that which is worth more than its weight in gold?

Am I willing to face the anguish and sorrow and pain of the cross

in order that I might be filled with God's presence?

Plead for His mercies and cry out in full surrender 

It is you I desire Lord!

It is you I desire far above all else!

Although I come with trembling heart, 

A heart fearful of what may be and what may come, 

I come nonetheless

I come Lord, I am yours and yours alone,

I come in Absolute Surrender,

My soul yields to your grace

I am yours

I surrender all

.:La Chula:.

Day 2 of 21: A Purposed-Filled Heart

 A Purposed-Filled Heart

In the third year of the reign of Jehoiakim king of Judah, Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon came to Jerusalem and besieged it...³ Then the king instructed Ashpenaz, the master of his eunuchs, to bring some of the children of Israel and some of the king’s descendants and some of the nobles, ⁴ young men in whom there was no blemish, but good-looking, gifted in all wisdom, possessing knowledge and quick to understand, who had ability to serve in the king’s palace, and whom they might teach the language and literature of the Chaldeans. ⁵ And the king appointed for them a daily provision of the king’s delicacies and of the wine which he drank, and three years of training for them, so that at the end of that time they might serve before the king. ⁶ Now from among those of the sons of Judah were Daniel, Hananiah, Mishael, and Azariah. ⁷ To them the chief of the eunuchs gave names: he gave Daniel the name Belteshazzar; to Hananiah, Shadrach; to Mishael, Meshach; and to Azariah, Abed-Nego.⁸ But Daniel purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself with the portion of the king’s delicacies, nor with the wine which he drank; therefore he requested of the chief of the eunuchs that he might not defile himself...¹⁷ As for these four young men, God gave them knowledge and skill in all literature and wisdom; and Daniel had understanding in all visions and dreams.

(Daniel 1:1-8, 17)

A young boy, torn from his home, exiled to a foreign land. Purposely sought out by an enemy whose chief desire it was to besiege his homeland and defile his God. A young man, nonetheless, and yet one who had already committed his life to God. One, whom in the eyes of even his enemies, was heralded as a man without blemish, who possessed all wisdom and knowledge.

Daniel's complete devotion and faith in God is evident within the first 20 verses of chapter 1 of the book of Daniel. Daniel had a marked purpose in life and that was to serve and glorify his God. Even as a young man, who had just faced a tremendous amount of turmoil, separated from his family and his home by thousands of miles, still had his devotion to God in the forefront of his mind. Daniel had purposed in his heart not to defile himself with the food of a pagan people. Translated from the Hebrew, Daniel's purposed-filled heart was one of decided resolution. A resolution to abstain from defilement, food and drink that was unclean and forbidden by the Mosaic Law. Daniel was a man of great character, one who sought hard after the heart of God.

A man's character will be shown in the midst of darkness and turmoil. The worth of a man's character is evident in his reaction to life when it is anything but pleasant. The strength of a man's faith is revealed in his devotion to God in the midst of  great sorrow and anguish. A sorrow and anguish that causes even the strongest of men to gasp for breath as the pain and burden of this turmoil is seemingly too heavy to bear. A man who buckles at his knees in the heaviness of a moment and yet still remains steadfast in his faith in God. This is a man of true character. A man who can bless the Lord in a land that is plentiful and yet still praise Him amidst a barren dessert with no hope in sight. The character of such a man is built in such places, but always found to be of great worth because he learns to be strengthened rather than broken by turmoil. Because he makes a very marked choice, purposing in his heart to serve and glorify God, even in the darkest of hours. Such character can only be harvested in darkness, in turmoil, in anguish, in sorrow, in that moment in life when you feel as if you have been boxed in on all sides. These are the times that God is able to part the Red Sea for us. To manifest Himself in ways that we would never fathom. To prove Himself true. The famous verse in Psalm 46:10, Be still and know that I am God , is actually translated in the Hebrew to say, Be still to know that I am God. In the midst of Babylon, we learn to be still and wait for God. Not necessarily by choice, but because we find ourselves boxed in on every side. In the midst of a dark valley. With the Egyptian army behind us, rocky mountains to the north of us and the Red Sea to the east and south of us. When we find ourselves with no options is when God is most able to show His very character, His strength, His compassion, His love, and the endless possibilities that are found in Him and only Him.

I write this with a heavy heart. Thinking of the countless number of Believers that essentially find themselves with no room to breath. That strange place in life where God seems to be afar off and silent. A serene lot in life when this tent we live in begins to crumble from disease and despair. The sorrowful moment when you realize that what once was no longer is and the very pain of that truth steals the breath from you lungs. The place where your sorrow is so deep that it hurts to breath, to utter God's name, to plead for His mercies. In the midst of a season where you can neither hear God nor see God, when you feel completely alone and abandoned.

I feel the pain for you today. I sense your sorrow and your desperate plea to feel the presence of God for but a moment. I feel, but more so, He feels. I want you to know Believer, that you are in the midst of being purified by God. Of being refined by fire. And strangely enough Believer, when you find yourself at the end of this valley, no matter how far off the light of day may seem, you will almost want to return to this place again....because this is the place where God is going to meet you face to face, and you will never be the same again.

.:La Chula:.

Day 1 of 21: A Man of Desires

^{A Man of Desires}

¹⁰ Then behold, a hand touched me and set me trembling on my hands and knees. ¹¹ He said to me, “O Daniel, man of high esteem, understand the words that I am about to tell you and stand upright, for I have now been sent to you.” And when he had spoken this word to me, I stood up trembling. ¹² Then he said to me, “Do not be afraid, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your heart on understanding this and on humbling yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to your words. ¹³ But the prince of the kingdom of Persia was withstanding me for twenty-one days; then behold, Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, for I had been left there with the kings of Persia. ¹⁴ Now I have come to give you an understanding of what will happen to your people in the latter days, for the vision pertains to the days yet future.”

(Daniel 10:10-14)

 Daniel, in today's standards, was a young man when he was taken into captivity, perhaps about 14-15 years old, some argue as young as 12. Daniel was called, more than once in the Scriptures, a man of high esteem. In the Hebrew, it is translated A man of desires. In short, Daniel was the object of God's delight. As the apocalyptic prophet of the New Testament was the disciple whom Jesus loved, so the apocalyptic prophet of the Old Testament was greatly beloved of God. That is, he was one whose happiness was greatly desired by God. He was a man after God's own heart and in turn, God listened to him, spoke to him, and revealed untold secrets to him. Daniel was a man of prayer. A man willing to give up of himself for the sake of others. Willing to go beyond himself in order to meet God in the secret place. Daniel fasted for 21 days, in anticipation that he would hear from God. The scripture says that he mourned for three weeks (Daniel 10:2). And in the midst of this 21 day battle, Christ appeared to Daniel and spoke to Him. Comforted him with these words:

 O Daniel, man of high esteem....from the first day that you set your heart on understanding this and on humbling yourself before your God, your words were heard and I have come in response to your words.

This 14 year old boy was found to be a mighty man of God. One who had captured the affection of God. One who had set his heart on understanding the very words of God. One who humbled himself before God for 21 days in order that he might hear from the True and Living God. And God, being One who is not slow to hear us, encouraged Daniel with these very words, You were heard and I am here in response to your words. This is an instance in scripture where we see the very heart of God exposed. The very character of God revealed. An instance where God intimately fellowships with His creation. This being a 14 year old boy, simply because He had put God first. His chief desire was to serve and honor God. He trusted Him, even unto the point of death; and this trust manifested itself throughout the book of Daniel, where you see this young boy seeking hard after God, placing his affection in Him, and serving him boldly regardless of the turmoil that was going on around him. Daniel was a man of prayer, a man who was willing to sit silently to hear the whispers of God. A man whose heart was set on knowing God at any cost.

My heart desires to hear from God. And yet, I see the life of Daniel and grow greatly dismayed at my own life. It is no wonder that I do not hear from God like this young boy did. He was a man after God's own heart. He trusted Him with his very life and had a faith that was unmovable. It is very evident from the Scriptures that Daniel desired God, to serve Him and to glorify Him, above all else. And therefore, Daniel was a man acquainted with sorrows. Acquainted with anguish. Acquainted with sacrifice. These very words strangely mirror the very life of Christ. And so, this thought brings me to the end of myself. Where am I willing to go from here? How long am I willing to wait in order that I might hear the voice of the True and Living God? And in this waiting, am I willing to become acquainted with  sorrow, anguish, and sacrifice, that I might come to the end of myself in order to know God in a different way? These are very sobering thoughts and heavy questions. And within the next 21 days, together through this blog, you will able see God manifest Himself in my life and watch my reaction to what He is calling me to do. What He is calling me to be. And therefore, what I am willing to do in response to this calling.

.:La Chula:.

Dead Man Walking

Dead Man Walking

10 I want to know Christ, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, 11 and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead. (Philippians 3:10-11)

My heart is heavy with anticipation today. There is a lot to press into. A lot to battle over. A tremendous amount of heaviness in which to partake. Believers who have lost their ways. Unbelievers who can't seem to find The Way. The anticipation stems from needing to hear from God. Not so much needing to hear, but wanting to hear, yearning to hear; To feel His presence, to know Him and be known by Him. That I may be fully acquainted with His nature, His character, His work, His hand.  It is my chief object of desire. Through trial and tribulation over the past 2 years, and essentially being torn from myself in the past 8 months, I have grown very uneasy and disappointed with what I have to offer to Christ and what I have been able to offer to a lost and dying world. I have been, for the majority of my Christian life, a dead man walking, devoid of true faith, hope, joy, and peace. And in my pursuit of God, or shall I say, in His pursuit of me, my eyes have been opened to a dead man standing, staring me in the face as my life has been placed before my eyes. To know Christ, to know the power of His resurrection, requires that I must participate in His sufferings and become like Him in His death. I see now that this yearning to know Christ requires my full participation and attentiveness to these matters. And yet, I sense the coming to the end of myself, in which my plea is that I taste of His sufferings and anguish and death that I might taste of Him. As the psalmist proclaimed, Taste and see that the Lord is good... He continues by exhorting us to find our sufficiency in the Lord, Blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him. To take refuge is to hide myself in His holiness. To be in such a presence requires that I must be willing to put an end to myself. That I must be willing to murder my flesh and die to my old man, stripping myself of the dead man and prostrating myself, naked, before God, that He might clothe me with His majesty, His grace, His love, His very character.

My eyes have been opened to this dead man I call self, and I am still yet grieved by the dead body we call the Church. We are as yet dead men walking. Failing to put our faith into action. Failing to want to know Christ in such a way that we are willing to put an end to those things that hinder us and way us down. Willing to partake in anguish, and suffering, and death in order to know the True and Living God. Unashamed to live a life set apart….

….And so today I have made my decision…

And I make it publically so as to never be able to turn back without shame and remorse. Today, I have decided that I will follow Jesus, even to the cross, even unto the point of death. As afraid I am to utter these words, I know that this proclamation is necessary in order that I might meet God in a new way. It makes no difference to me if the world or even the body of Christ forsakes me. It makes no difference to me if I am mocked and ridiculed, if my brethren forsake me, if the body of Christ calls me a fool. Let it be known today that I have decided to kill the old man, to murder my flesh, to throw off everything that hinders me, and to press on to the High Calling of God. No turning back, no turning back!

.:La Chula:.